Penalty kicks

Peter Handke

Yesterday's high dramatic football match between Italy and England, scoreless after regulation and two extended periods, reminded me of one of my favorite literary titles, Peter Handke's The Goalie's Anxiety at the Penalty Kick. Because this was how the match would be decided -- even though Italy outplayed England throughout and, except for hitting crossbars, could have won easily in regulation. When England took a temporary lead during penalty kicks, I thought Italy might be robbed, but they recovered and won and move on to the semis.

What is incredible about European football is that a scoreless game can be so engaging and tense and dramatic. It took me a while to understand this -- several years, in fact. But the key is understanding attack strategy in the more popular game. And understanding time and its relationship to drama. In American football, most of real time is spent between plays -- in other words, nothing is happening most of the time! Time in European football is always active, building tension, increasing the dramatic moment. It can drive you crazy. It's much more tiring to watch this than slow, slow, slow American football. I'm very curious how I'll make out this fall when it returns, after finally understanding why the world is right and American is wrong about "football." Of course, most Americans can't admit anything they do is inferior to another country's version. Americans are too arrogant to embrace "football" the way the rest of the world does, despite various attempts in leagues here.

After the game, I tried watching the Portland-Seattle soccer game but the level of play was so poor in comparison I found it frustrating and stopped watching. We have a very long way to go in this country to gain the skill of teams like Germany or Spain. Give either the ball, and the atmosphere becomes electric as they move down the field with an evolving attack strategy. There is never a dull moment in this game because the ball is always in play. The drama is relentless.

Here's what the Guardian wrote about the game:

"a night of grand footballing drama in Kiev that was first explosive, then thumb-gnawingly attritional, and finally, for England, rather desolate.

Most American sports fans don't get it because they haven't taken the time to understand a game that's more complex (chess to checkers) than their version.